Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet
confinement of your aloneness
to learn
anything or anyone
that does not bring you alive
is too small for you.
— David Whyte, Sweet Darkness

I’ve been on the receiving end of a few calls in the last week. People who I’ve worked with, befriended and sometimes mentored. I tend to listen well when all someone wants is for someone to listen. We all need that now and then, don’t we? The world is full of people who call out in the darkness. I believe that it can always use more people who answer that call.

We’re closing in on the darkest day of the year in the northern hemisphere. I don’t mind darkness so much. I wear it like an old flannel shirt that becomes a part of us over time. I view the seasons for what they are and the changes they bring, and work to be present in it. Still, the days are very short this time of year. And for a lot of people, all that time in the dark makes the absences feel more apparent. What is missing is as much a part of who we are as what we have.

We make the most of our situations, hopeful that things will somehow change, looking for a spark in the darkness from which we may find our way. Sometimes we overstay our time in the dark, simply because we get used to living in it. We forget sometimes that this is our one go at things. If something or someone isn’t making us feel alive, surely it’s slowly killing us. That lesson is apparent when we escape the darkness, but hard to see when we’re in it.

Just as a match requires friction to create a spark, choosing joyful connection over isolation is a path to the light. Like attracts like, the law of attraction insists, and we find that we aren’t so alone after all. That which brings us alive is our lifeline to enlightenment and fulfillment. We shouldn’t waste a second holding on to anything else.