Blog

  • Inhabited by Heroes

    “On whatever side I look off I am reminded of the mean and narrow-minded men whom I have lately met there. What can be uglier than a country occupied by grovelling, coarse, and low-lived men? No scenery will redeem it. What can be more beautiful than any scenery inhabited by heroes? Any landscape would be glorious to me, if I were assured that its sky was arched over a single hero.” — Henry David Thoreau, The Journal of Henry David Thoreau

    There’s always been two sides to America. Those who build on the foundation of freedom and liberty for all and those who would tear it all down and watch it burn. The thing is, we all believe we’re on the side of freedom and liberty—it’s all in how those words are interpreted. And so we all believe our cause is just and dig in for a fight. We aren’t fighting a Civil War in the traditional sense, but a manufactured war stirred up by profiteers and agents of destruction. The country has always had an abundance of grovelling, coarse, and low-lived men (and women!) on both sides who serve themselves first and foremost. Thoreau wrote this entry in 1851, and he would recognize the characters today as descendants in spirit of those he encountered.

    The real heroes strive for consensus and unification. Inclusiveness isn’t woke, it’s a shared vision that those “unalienable Rights” of Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness apply to all of us. This is a dream that extends from sea to shining sea, and yes, across borders—autocrats and oligarchs, racists and “bro culture” be damned.

    These are dark days, and they will grow darker still. We all look around looking for heroes to unite us once again. Look in the mirror, friend. The strength of this country has always resided in our core, where reasonable people with common hopes and dreams reside. And here is where the heroes of the moral core must rise up and seize control of reason and dignity once again. We can’t simply wait it out hoping for better days.

  • All of It

    “Quiet is peace. Tranquility. Quiet is turning down the volume knob on life. Silence is pushing the off button. Shutting it down. All of it.” — Khaled Hosseini, The Kite Runner

    To expect answers is to assume that there’s order in the universe. That’s a wide lens that comes in handy when the world embraces chaos and throws order on the bonfires. To discuss the matter with the agents of chaos is futile. They only want heated debates, mic drop dismissals and wild conspiracy theories. There is no peace or consensus in their world, only outrage. Nor is there peace amongst those outraged by those being outrageous. Shared resolve, possibly, but there is no stillness when the pot is constantly being stirred.

    And so we must find quiet resolve in the company of timeless ideas and principles. Nature and the classics, poetry and song, and the rituals of routine that quiet the mind and clarify our purpose. We’ll be the better for having walked away from the loud talkers. When they run out of reasonable people to debate they’ll simply turn on each other. To find stillness, steer clear of all of it. The quiet resolve that develops within will be more essential than ever soon enough.

  • Light, Sand, Wind and Water

    The wind is howling today, and the pup and I duck our heads to protect against the beach sand hurling through space at 50 knots looking for a hard landing. I’m tired of words today, and so we risk the sandblasting beach in search of magical light. This will do.

  • Limitations and Openings

    Any framework, method, or label
    you impose on yourself
    is just as likely to be a limitation
    as an opening.
    — Rick Ruben, The Creative Act: A Way of Being

    Every morning I wake up and start to think about what I’m going to write about. Routine has brought me to this place, and even if the entire day turns to crap, even if I’m distracted and frustrated by the world around me, even if it feels like this will be the last blog I ever write because I’m just done with the entire process, my mind settles into the rhythm of writing just as soon as my fingers begin to keep up with where my mind is taking them. And here we are again.

    This blog is not taking the world by storm. I’m under no illusion of grandeur about my place in the lives of its readers, or the number of ripples these thoughts and words will carry across space and time. I write because I fancy myself both a thinker and a writer, and it follows that one ought to jot down what one is thinking about, if only to see where it takes us.

    The question is, does the process take us to a breakthrough, or are we simply going around in circles? Is the very act of blogging a limitation on other writing that isn’t being done because the mind is satiated every morning at around this time? And what other habits and routines would take the place of writing, should it be relegated to later in the day? Would the writing slip like workouts slip?

    We’re caught in a trap
    I can’t walk out
    Because I love you too much, baby
    — Elvis Presley, Suspicious Minds

    We know when it’s time for a change. But how often does knowing lead to doing? Identity is built on the habits and routines we create our days with. And our days in turn become our lives. We ought to ask ourselves when we’ve finished writing and click publish, is this process a limitation for me or an opening? Just where are we going anyway?

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  • Let the Thunder Rumble

    “Rise free from care before the dawn, and seek adventures. Let the noon find thee by other lakes, and the night overtake thee everywhere at home. There are no larger fields than these, no worthier games than may here be played. Grow wild according to thy nature, like these sedges and brakes, which will never become English bay. Let the thunder rumble; what if it threaten ruin to farmers’ crops? That is not its errand to thee. Take shelter under the cloud, while they flee to carts and sheds. Let not to get a living be thy trade, but thy sport. Enjoy the land, but own it not. Through want of enterprise and faith men are where they are, buying and selling, and spending their lives like serfs.”
    — Henry David Thoreau, Walden

    In a free society, living like a serf is mostly a lifestyle choice. It’s falling in line, or being outraged by those who sip the Kool-Aid. It’s getting trapped in a bad routine, with habits that whittle away our time and quietly strangle us. It’s living in an echo chamber of like-minded outrage while life slips away and opportunities are lost. It’s giving up our agency to move our lives in the direction we want to go in because it never seems like the right time, with all that’s happening right now. We must know that it’s never going to be the right time.

    The current state of the world suggests chaos, and surely there is plenty of chaos in the world, but mostly it’s abrupt and ugly change and the reaction to that change. This hyper-focused echo chamber isn’t helping us get through our days in productive, compelling ways, even if it feels essential that we react to every damned thing the news cycle and our spun up circle of family and friends throw at us. We must learn to focus only on what we can control, and more, to be bold with our days.

    “Shake off this erroneous notion that life is there and you’re just going to live in it, versus embrace it. Change it. Improve it. Make your mark upon it.” — Steve Jobs, from the 1994 Santa Clara Valley Historical Association interview

    I had some bold plans for 2025. Started down the path, excitement growing, and then things went south and I found myself with cancelled plans and a closet full of adventure gear. The thing is, it wasn’t anything I hadn’t fully expected, because plans blow in the wind. We can either shrug and give up when the world has other plans or we can move on to other plans within our control.

    Identity is honed by experience. Experiences build upon each other and give us the confidence to be bolder still. Don’t simply live this life based on what other people expect of us; fully embrace it. Let the thunder rumble. Live the kind of life that others aspire to live themselves.

  • Accepting the Path

    Before I′m pushin’ up daisies
    Give me a long, heady summer
    With arms open wide
    I won′t take this world for granted
    I’ll become what I′ve been askin’
    I′ll accept the path that lays before my eyes
    — Sam Fender, Nostalgia’s Lie

    In order to chase the dream, we must first decide to launch ourselves in that direction. The launch is nothing but the first step in a series of steps, and anyone wondering what happened to their New Years resolutions knows the score on first steps. It’s the ones after the first that really count, because we’re gradually trying on a new identity, one step at a time, accepting the path that we’ve determined for ourselves as ours.

    Decide what to be and go be it, as the Avett Brothers song demands of us, and surely it must be so for us to reach our creative potential, for us to get closer to our version of personal excellence, to realize the dream. Don’t be that person on their death bed wondering what happened. What happened was forever deferring the path in favor of the maze. Once we step into a maze the path is no longer clear, and what feels like progress is often nothing but a dead end.

    We don’t always know a maze until we’re in it, but hit enough dead ends and it becomes evident eventually. The answer, of course, is to get the hell out of the maze and back on the path. To become what we’ve been asking of ourselves. Where each step makes the path clearer than it was before. Knowing deep down that whatever the path, the clock is ticking.

  • Our Many Short Races

    “Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other.” — Walter Elliot

    Fortitudine vincimus (by endurance we conquer) — the family motto of Sir Ernest Shackleton

    When we look back on our lives thus far, we often gloss over the small, daily challenges that we had to overcome just to get through the day and only remember the good times we had. Sure, we remember the big setbacks and the losses (it’s hard to ever forget a gut punch). But each small challenge conquered honed and shaped who we are. The race was won, at least that day’s race, and we moved on to the next.

    My favorite rowing workout is an interval workout of 10×500 meters. It’s an intense burst of energy applied to a relatively short distance, and then a brief rest period before doing it all over again. I’m still covering 5000 meters, but there’s no time to settle in to a lower standard of performance or to get bored. Work, rest, work again until the work is done.

    So why not apply this process to our creative work? Write quickly, take a minute or two minute walk away from the work and then jump right back into it again. It adds up to more work, but often better work too. There’s no time for distraction, no time for anything but producing our best in that short burst of time before we earn another break.

    Every day is a series of challenges that must be overcome for us to earn the knowledge, skills or nerve to move on to the next. We climb ever higher, we get pushed back, adjust and push forward again. It’s not a long slog into infinity, it’s simply today’s short race. When we focus on the short race we’re currently working through, we think less about the short break someone else may be posting pictures about on social media, or the work someone we admire just published that feels out of reach for our current ability. We’re in a different race, after all, and our task is simply to finish this micro burst with focus and intensity.

    Zoom back out, and we see seismic shifts happening politically, economically, culturally… and it feels like this race may be too overwhelming for us to be in. But we’re in it just the same. We forget that that larger game at play isn’t our weight to bear alone. Don’t let the bastards grind you down (that’s what they want us to feel—ground down and powerless). Focus on the race we’re running and chase personal excellence in the things we alone are doing with our time. Life may indeed be a marathon and not a sprint, but all races are completed one stride at a time.

  • What Carries the Day

    I went on a lunch date with my bride Saturday. We didn’t talk politics, we talked about new dinner plates and the house and things like that. Sometimes the present is both beautiful and awful, and the only thing that determines which wins the moment is what we choose to focus on.

    There are plenty of reasons to feel down about the state of the world. There are plenty of reasons to feel joyful. As reasonable people, it’s possible to feel both at the same time. But we ought to be asking ourselves, which carry the day? A poem by Charles Bukowski, formatted in that Charles Bukowski way, comes to mind:

    some people
    grind away
    making their
    unhappiness
    the ultimate
    factor
    of their
    existence
    until
    finally
    they are
    just
    automatically
    unhappy,
    their
    suspicious
    upset
    snarling
    selves
    gringing

    on
    and
    at
    and
    for
    and
    through

    their only
    relief
    being

    to meet
    another
    unhappy
    person

    or
    to
    create
    one.

    — Charles Bukowski, downers

    When we get so distracted by the state of things, we sometimes forget to do the joyful things that make living an event worthy of our time. We can create a wake of misery behind us, or we can leave a ripple of joy. We should ask, just how do we want to be remembered? But let’s get right to the heart of the matter: just how do we want to move through this one go at life?

  • Holding to Reason in a Maddening World

    “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.” ― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

    Our entire social structure is an echo chamber now. Our media is curated for us. And we curate too. We’ve reached a point where anyone we disagree with automatically gets muted or unfollowed or otherwise edited out of the stories we like to tell ourselves. And so it is that we only get one side of the story and get shocked by things like election outcomes, the erratic behavior of people we otherwise have so much in common with and the escalation of outrage. Yet it’s completely logical when we only hear one perspective.

    There are many of us who feel the United States has just descended into madness. That doesn’t mean we ourselves should descend into madness with those who engineered such things. They love it when they get a rise out of us, and go regressively deeper into despicable behavior to provoke. Don’t take the bait. We haven’t reached the low point yet, so buckle up and prepare for the next worst moment in modern democracy. Fight for all that is right in this world but always hold the high ground.

    I purchased a new American flag last week to replace the one that was old and frayed by years of flying in the elements. My flag is not a symbol of support for the current autocrats and oligarchs running my country, but a reminder of all that we once believed. I wondered whether I should take it down and put up a Gadsden flag (Don’t Tread on Me), but it’s already been coopted by the Tea Party zealots. And why give up my own country so easily? As they run this country into the ground wrapped in clever and well-funded marketing and imagery, remember the truth lies somewhere between what the most shrill voices on either side are screaming. We must hold the line with reason.

    I don’t write this with optimism, but from the perspective of someone who accepts whatever fate the universe imposes (amor fati). We don’t have to love it, but here we are. What are we going to do about it now? When they provoke for anger, answer with quiet resolve. For this is not who we are. And our collective story is still being written.

  • Answers

    “Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer.” — William S. Burroughs

    Yes, and how many years must a mountain exist
    Before it is washed to the sea?
    And how many years can some people exist
    Before they’re allowed to be free?
    Yes, and how many times can a man turn his head
    And pretend that he just doesn’t see?
    The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind
    — Bob Dylan, Blowin’ in the Wind

    The world is a confusing mess that we may either work to make sense of or practice active avoidance of. Most of us are somewhere in the middle. I used to pride myself on reading the news every day, and doubled down by watching the news every morning to be informed before I stepped out the door. It was my way of having a perspective on things when asked for my opinion, but also because I thought it was my duty as a citizen to know what the hell was happening.

    Lately, I’ve had an ongoing dialogue with a good friend about which media source is most unbiased. We all should know that they’re all biased, because they’re all hoping for enough traction to be profitable, but which is the best for fair and mostly unbiased information? Those who follow one source for all information are a slave to that source. We must seek information from multiple sources and sort it out ourselves.

    Or not. The historian in me knows the truth is never found in the headlines, but in the stories that come out long after the dust settles. We know certain truths, but we certainly don’t know everything. The lens of time offers true perspective. And even though we see the world burning, even though we may feel outraged far more than we ever believed we’d be outraged at this point in human history, we must separate emotion from the moment and see what happens (while fighting for what’s right in this world).

    We know that those who say they have it all figured out are generally full of crap and trying to sell us something (well, unfortunately, slightly less than half of us know that). Knowing everything is not in the cards. Our answers will come to us in time, if we’re lucky enough to have time, and so we must rely on what we believe to be true for us and set ourselves in a direction that feels right.

    All that said, the historian in me also knows that history is written by the victors, and vast swaths of truth have been swept aside and blown away in the winds of time. We’ll never know the full story about anything, only what we are able to capture and discern. The trick for us in this moment is to ensure that we come out on the other side to bring the truth to the future.

    And that brings me back to the Burroughs quote that kicked us off today. We must learn to quiet our minds and find the answers within ourselves in the context of the times we live in. To be aware of the world is essential for navigating within it, but we cannot forget to turn inward and listen to what our own truth is. And if we find those answers, we may set our compass in a direction that carries us through the confusion and madness in the world to a place we know deep down is right for us.