Category: Music

  • As and Always

    As now can’t reveal the mystery of tomorrow
    But in passing will grow older every day
    Just as all that’s born is new
    You know what I say is true
    That I’ll be loving you always
    — Stevie Wonder, As

    I’m feeling older today with yesterday’s passing. Sore all over, mentally tired, wondering why I didn’t hire someone to put new shingles on the shed. I know the answer: Because I can do it myself. And so I pay the price and won’t complain.

    For me, As is Stevie Wonder at his creative peak. It’s been a long time since I listed favorite songs from any artist. I won’t be doing it today. I’ll simply recognize the sparkle in this gem. It was part of the soundtrack played on repeat yesterday that carried me through the challenging stages. Music lifts us in such moments.

    The thing about roofing that shed is I know if I do it right I will never do it again. In 20 or 30 years, I will not be climbing up a ladder with a handful of shingles. Like planting a tree, it’s a gift to a future I may not see. We should move through every day as if we are leaving a gift for our children’s grandchildren. For we will not always be here, but we may offer something to always.

  • October Skies

    Well, it’s a marvelous night for a moondance
    With the stars up above in your eyes
    A fantabulous night to make romance
    ‘Neath the cover of October skies
    And all the leaves on the trees are fallin’
    To the sound of the breezes that blow
    And I’m trying to please to the callin’
    Of your heart strings that play soft and low
    — Van Morrison, Moondance

    The October sky in New England is a wonderful thing. Sunrises and sunsets are full of color that somehow match the foliage as it peaks. There is a crescendo when all of the colors are most vibrant and then it all seems to fade away. And so we ought to put ourselves in the way of beauty, just as Cheryl Strayed’s mother suggested. We are either there for it or we aren’t.

    It all goes so quickly. Autumn foliage sprinkles us with magic and all too soon fades and returns to the earth. Blink and we miss it. The lesson is to get out and see what we can while the opportunity presents itself. And we know that the lesson applies well beyond leaves.

    Tempus fugit. Time flies. Dare to use our time, or risk losing it. Every day may be a love affair with life. As with any love, life will only offer to us what we put into it. It’s up to us to notice the details. We may choose to play an active role in the chores that make each day meaningful and productive. We may dare to ask ourselves in those moments of hopeful scheming, how may we extend this magic just a little longer?

  • Fear (The Little Death)

    “I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.” — Frank Herbert, Dune

    Fear seems to be popping up a lot in my world lately. Not because I’m afraid so much as the idea of it comes up all the time. We know that once we notice something we see it everywhere. Well, fear was noticed, and here we are.

    What are we afraid of anyway? Death? Memento mori. Whether we’re afraid or not, we will all die anyway. Failure? Life is one failure after another. But it’s also one success after another. Need an example? We all woke up today. Call it a win.

    The thing is, most fear that holds us back from doing something is a dream dying on the vine. String enough dead dreams together and we’ve wasted our lives. Ignore enough fears and maybe we reach summits we’d hardly dare to dream of they seemed so audacious.

    We’re wounded by fear
    Injured in doubt
    I can lose myself
    You I can’t live without
    — U2, Red Hill Mining Town

    What is so important to us that we feel the fear and do it anyway? What is worthy of our courage now? What are we waiting for? We know deep down that tomorrow is too late. Socrates told us that we must seize what flees. Tempus fugit: Time flies. And the opportunities of a lifetime fly with it.

  • Kingdoms Fall

    October and the trees are stripped bare
    Of all they wear
    What do I care?
    October and kingdoms rise
    And kingdoms fall
    But you go on
    And on
    — U2, October

    Inevitably, I encounter simmering rage when I listen long enough. That’s America now—rage in one form or another. It’s everywhere. Yes, common at the extremes on both sides, but creeping more and more into the middle. An even keel is hard to maintain in a tumultuous sea. We are in the midst of a storm brought on by profiteers and pirates. Bastards.

    If I sound distant from the rage myself, well, it’s a deliberate act to remove myself from the storm. Maybe there are no safe harbors in a storm like this, but we ought to find places of refuge to take stock of where we are, what we stand for, who we want to be and what we want to be remembered as one day when all of this is being cleaned up and analyzed by future generations. Those of us who reside in the middle keep this ship from capsizing. We choose whether the scales will be forever tipped.

    It’s October. Peak foliage days before it all falls away and all that we are left with are memories of what was and what might have been if we’d only paid more attention. Seasons come and go. All that will be left of us one day is what we choose to leave behind.

  • The Schooner Ardelle on a Celtic Sunset Cruise

    These summer clouds she sets for sail,
    The sun is her masthead light,
    She tows the moon like a pinnace frail
    Where her phosphor wake churns bright.
    Now hid, now looming clear,
    On the face of the dangerous blue
    The star fleets tack and wheel and veer,
    But on, but on does the old earth steer
    As if her port she knew.
    — William Vaughn Moody, Gloucester Moors

    We know when we are in the midst of something extraordinary. Anticipation creeps up on us as the minutes pass by, awaiting our participation. Awareness floods in as the magic unfolds. Joy and gratitude edge in, provoking other emotions. There comes a time when we must simply put away the camera, stop searching for just the right word or phrase, and simply be a part of all that is happening around us.

    Gloucester, Massachusetts has a long history with the sea. Its famous harbor has long welcomed home fisherman and sailors from passages as far and wide as the ocean’s reach. One feels the history sailing in this harbor, and you play some small part in the play for having been here at all. The fleets of old are mostly all gone now, ghosts of what once was. But there are a few holdouts, and newcomers built in the traditional way, to offer some hint of what it was like long ago.

    Harold Burnham has built several schooners in the traditional fashion. For a couple of centuries the Burnham’s have built ships in Essex, Massachusetts. Two of his schooners are harbored in nearby Gloucester, and Harold himself captains sunset cruises. You simply have to put yourself in the way of beauty and sign up to participate. And if you’re especially fortunate, you may join on a night of Celtic music to offer a proper soundtrack for a September night when the clouds are just so to harness a bit of heavenly magic.

    Maritime Heritage Charters offers many opportunities to learn and experience a few hours on a schooner sailing in Gloucester Harbor. One not to miss is the Celtic Music Sunset Sail with Michael O’Leary & Friends cruise, when traditional music and song fill the heart and soul as you slip past history and witness the divine dance of fading light. The experience is one that will stay with you forever.

    The Schooner Ardelle, Gloucester, Massachusetts
  • Step Out

    Now I’m thinkin’ about her everyday
    On my mind, atypical way
    Are you a life force?
    — Caamp, By and By

    It must be the cold air in the dark hours. September offers more dark hours, and thus more cold air, than the preceding months. When we walk out into colder air, we feel we’re walking out into something. We learn to brace for it. We come to love it.

    As we pull on an extra layer and step out from the walls that surround us into the infinite truth, what comes to mind? For me, the music on my mind is seasonal. Just as I have my summer soundtrack, I have a soundtrack for autumn. It’s like welcoming an old friend back. Here we are again. So much has changed but we still have this.

    Are you a life force? In these angry, divisive and violent times, just what do we stand for? What walls currently surround us, holding us back from something infinitely larger than who we are? Step out and find the truth.

  • Release the Dancers

    “He was weary of himself, of cold thoughts and intellectual dreams. Life a poem! Not when you perpetually went around inventing your life instead of living it. How meaningless it was, empty, empty, empty. This hunting for yourself, slyly observing your own tracks—in a circle, of course; this pretending to throw yourself into the stream of life and then at the same time sitting and angling for yourself and fishing yourself up in some peculiar disguise! If only it would seize him: life, love, passion—so that he wouldn’t be able to invent it, but so that it would invent him.”
    — Jens Peter Jacobsen, Niels Lyhne

    There’s a fine line between imagination and invention. We dream big dreams, or perhaps simply a wee wish or two, and they each dance about happily in our imagination until we do the work to realize them or eventually get sick of being teased by the dancers and find something else with which to fancy for awhile. Life isn’t meant to be a dream, it’s meant to be a gradual realization of our potential. It’s a matter of turning imagination into reality through deliberate and purposeful work. That line is crossed through action.

    “Decide what to be and go be it.”… The Avett Brothers lyric that lives rent free in my head.

    Incremental experience—the experience that Jacobsen’s character Niels is pining for—in turn forever reinvents us. The person we’ve become is far more capable of doing this next thing than the person we were then. We imagine possibilities we couldn’t imagine from our previous vantage point, and we move along a timeline of steady progression.

    It’s natural to chafe at the limitations of our current level of experience. This discomfort is a catalyst for change—if we allow it to be anyway. Unless we’re forever paralyzed by inaction and low agency. We must develop our voice over time and learn to use it to realize possibility:

    Alas for those that never sing,
    But die with all their music in them!
    — Oliver Wendell Holmes, The Voiceless

    We are forever inventing ourselves or settling into the stasis of an under-developed character. We must raise our voice and sing! This life is flying along with or without our active participation. By all means, step away from the mirage of dreams and do something with this day. Release the dancers!

  • Drive

    So if I decide to waiver my
    Chance to be one of the hive
    Will I choose water over wine
    And hold my own and drive?
    Oh
    It’s driven me before
    And it seems to be the way, that everyone else gets around
    But lately I’m
    Beginning to find that when I drive myself, my light is found
    Whatever tomorrow brings I’ll be there
    With open arms and open eyes, yeah
    Whatever tomorrow brings I’ll be there
    I’ll be there

    — Incubus, Drive

    When we finally step away from the endless loop of habit, when we break free of that relentless and pervasive collective belief about who we are and what we ought to be doing with our lives, we may be surprised at the character who emerges. There’s much more to us than the stories we’ve told ourselves. Identity is honed one choice at a time.

    Since completing a summer of transformative action, I gave myself a break. Easing off the twice a day workouts, having some carbs with that protein (or skipping the protein for carbs), and perhaps the most transformative thing of all, indulging in a few drinks to mark the occasion(s). A few days of that will inform pretty quickly. We can easily slide back into who we once were, or we can decide that there’s no going back and reset our days accordingly. It’s like moving back home after college—we’re different people than we were before, and those old rules don’t apply quite the same way.

    Choosing water over wine more often than the other way around profoundly impacts wellness. This is not much of a secret, but it isn’t something we like to think about when we’re deep in the cycle of having a glass of wine with dinner, and another to cap off the evening. I’ve found that my sleep score is greatly improved when I don’t drink. Deep, restorative rest is more important than ever for me. Is our sleep pattern the foundation of wellness? Ask someone who doesn’t sleep well. How’s your sleep? What ought to change to improve it?

    My answer to making significant changes in my life is to choose big goals but the smallest possible increments with which to move the chains. I have a big round number birthday coming up in the spring, and there are a few things I’d like to be when I get there. Healthy and fit, for starters. But also more informed than I am now by continuing on a path of learning that is accretive. And of course, this writing path has a natural milestone that must be crossed eventually.

    Each of us has a vision of who we’d like to be at some point in our lives. We forget that time is flying along (tempus fugit) and we’re quickly running out of runway to take off. Applying a bit of lift each day is the only way to ever get off the ground. Sure, light is where we find it—gratitude and awareness of who we are today is as essential to our wellness as sleep, diet or exercise, but rising to an ever-higher level of illumination optimizes who we will be when we get there. Growth is by its very nature expansive, even as it remains deeply rooted in identity.

    Whatever tomorrow brings, surely we hope to be there. Just who do we want to be when we arrive? There’s no time to waste now, friend. Drive.

  • Things We’ll Remember

    These are the days you might fill with laughter until you break
    These days you might feel a shaft of light
    Make its way across your face
    And when you do you’ll know how it was meant to be
    See the signs and know their meaning
    It’s true
    You’ll know how it was meant to be
    Hear the signs and know they’re speaking to you, to you
    — 10,000 Maniacs, These Are Days

    Life seems far bigger and more monumental in some phases than in others. This applies equally to joyous moments and to the occasionally devastating. We might move through months without much of note happening save the change of the seasons, and then everything seems to happen at once. Things we’ll remember for the rest of our lives happen in clusters, and then suddenly everything grows quiet again for a short time. Life is full of ebbs and flows, and sometimes the wind blows just enough to compress everything into a mad jumble. We ought to remember in such moments that we don’t get rainbows without a little rain.

    Awareness is seeing the signs all around us and embracing life as it comes to us. This may be a joyful exercise or cynical, but our experience is usually a direct reflection of what we are projecting to the universe. We all know people who light up a room when they walk into it, and people who similarly bring a room down. Which do we want to be?

  • One Dance Left

    This whole damn world could fall apart
    You’ll be okay, follow your heart
    You’re in harm’s way, I’m right behind
    Now say you’re mine
    You’ve got the music in you
    Don’t let go
    You’ve got the music in you
    One dance left
    This world is gonna pull through
    Don’t give up
    You’ve got a reason to live
    Can’t forget
    We only get what we give

    — New Radicals, You Get What You Give

    You Get What You Give was released in 1998, which was surely a monumental year in my life. After this weekend, I’ll always think of the song differently, yet just the same. It neatly bookends a few chapters in this epic we’re collectively writing in our lives, and maybe you strongly associate it with a few moments in your own life too. Some songs seem to stir up emotion and magic in just the right way. Thank the DJ for spinning the playlist so breathtakingly right.

    And after the music stops, after the guests have all gone home, what then? Look around. There’s so much more to do. We can’t give it all up now, friend. For life is about momentum. It’s the Jim Collins analogy about pushing the flywheel: It wasn’t any one push, it was pushing every day that built all that we have in our lives. Momentum works for or against us. A little rest and recovery is necessary, but we must know when to rise back up to meet the next moment.

    And that moment? Here it comes, ready or not. Best to be prepared to meet it, don’t you think? After all, we only get what we give.