Alexandersmap

    Tag: Paris

    • The Path Becomes Clear

      “In the end, it is important to remember that we cannot become what we need to be, by remaining what we are.” — Max De Pree, Leadership Is an Art

      A couple of weeks ago in Paris, my bride and I were taking the Metro after a night around the city back to our hotel. We’d done this ride enough in our few days in Paris to have a clear idea of direction. But something unexpected happened; we stopped at a station and everyone was told to get off. The line was shut down because of an incident one stop away, which was exactly where we were heading to make a connection.

      Most people simply started walking, either to another line for an end-around, or got out of the Metro altogether to walk, Uber or attempt a taxi (no easy task with hundreds of people trying the same thing). One young man sat stubbornly in his seat, arguing with the Metro officers insisting he get off. What are we to do in such moments? Start with a map, or nowadays, an app, to show the way.

      Take the average of this blog and you may find it’s largely focused on the act of becoming what’s next. Decide what to be and go be it, as The Avett Brothers put it (so often quoted in this blog). Well, what happens when we arrive at what we wanted to be? Or just as often, what happens when the universe denies us the path we were on to reaching that place? We pivot and decide on what to do next.

      We are attracted to moving water over stagnated water because we intuitively know which is better for us. To be like water, fluid and forever transforming as life rolls on, is a path to avoid stagnation and more, to thrive. We are forever pulled in different directions. The needs of others in our lives are one pull. The current and future needs of ourselves is another. Work or other pursuits are right there pulling too. Write the book? Buy the boat? Move across town or to another country? Retire or work to the end of our days? So many choices, so precious little time to do it all. No wonder so many simply stay right where they are.

      We need a good compass in such moments. We need to stop talking so much and listen. The right way is calling, waiting for someone to pick up. That someone is us, buckaroo. Just what are we waiting for? Where to next? Calm down and have a look at what needs to be done next. The path out of confusion is always one step at a time.

      That night in Paris, we saw that the answer was to walk 20 minutes to a station where we could get directly on the Metro line we needed to be on to get back to our hotel. Every taxi had a red light. The Uber pickup area was jammed. Walking was our answer. So we walked with a gradually thinning crowd as each individual’s path became clear to them. We all have our path beyond the confusion of the moment. Sometimes we just have to pause a beat to see it and go be it.

    • An Expansive Life

      What do you want from life
      To get cable TV
      and watch it every night
      There you sit
      a lump in your chair
      — The Tubes, What Do You Want From Life?

      I was talking to someone I’ve known a long time at a family event last week, and mentioned that I’d be visiting Paris later this summer. His response surprised me. He looked at me earnestly, and asked, “But what about the rioters?” And with that, he reminded me that underneath his gruff exterior, he was a fearful boy who watches too much television “news”.

      I’m not here to judge the person I was talking to (I like him very much), or to berate the entertainment vehicle he watches that calls itself a news program (I would rather have my nails extracted than watch news programs), but I think it’s fair to ask ourselves, what exactly do we want from life? To be spun up in a fearful ball afraid to venture across borders real and imagined, or to reach beyond our comfort zone to try something new? We will live a life as expansive as we wish it to be.

      We have agency in how our lives go. We may be street smart and still venture into unfamiliar places far beyond our locked doors. Be bold! Life will end either way. ’tis better to wear out than to rust away. The world awaits our next move.

    • The Climb to Optimal

      “Lack of activity destroys the good condition of every human being, while movement and methodical physical exercise save it and preserve it.” — Plato

      That old expression “use it or lose it” has never seemed more truthful than it is now. Watching people in my life decline as either their bodies or their minds fall off a cliff is eye-opening, but watching my own health incrementally decline is a louder wake up call. The thing about wake up calls is that not everybody listens to them. Some people just hit snooze and go back to what they were doing before. For some people the wake up call is a fatal heart attack or a stroke when everything was seemingly normal. Normal is nothing but a state that we’re used to. Forget normal: aspire to optimal.

      This summer I jump-started my life with a regimented mental toughness plan. The usual workouts weren’t enough anymore. The usual reading wasn’t enough anymore. And that “all things in moderation” diet I subscribed to wasn’t enough anymore either. I’d had enough of just enough, and it was slowly killing me. And so I gave my comfortable routine the boot in favor of days filled with disciplined, consistent action. The climb to optimal is underway.

      Not wishing to talk about what I’m going to do, I favor forensics. What have I done to arrive at where I am now? What does that teach me about where I’m hoping to get to? Losing 25 pounds was necessary, but is it optimal? Optimal for what? The answers always lead to more questions on this journey through our days. Fine-tuning our goals as we fine-tune our bodies and minds is all part of the process of optimization.

      I may not ever hike the Appalachian Trail. I might not ever stroll the cobblestone sidewalks of Rue de l’Abreuvoir in Montmartre as dusk turns to night. And I may never summon up the mental discipline to complete that epic novel I’ve been toying with for years. But then again, I might do all of these things and more. Just what do we want out of life anyway? Our odds of achieving these goals are better living a life of optimal health, fitness and discipline.